i'm pathologically optimistic

GOODTHINGSDON'TLASTFOREVER

2009-11-07T02:56:00.002+08:00

My mind shifted. No longer lovin this space like how i used to, that explains my constant absence . Again not like anyone reads this . Im waiting for the moment when such feelings towards smth else occurs again, smth else like a boy that has been driving me insane for several months. Don't expect any updates anymore, well but not forever.

http://sinkyourteethintobizarredreams.tumblr.com/

things are simpler there, truer too. but don't expect explicit explanations of my feelings.

WITHOUTYOU

2009-10-31T17:14:00.002+08:00

I hate goodbyes. I'm feeling so empty right now , it's like i hate how everything reminds me of you but then again i miss you so badly i can bleed.You've just left me for about 45 mins but it seems like it has been forever. The room is still in a mess with all the remnants of your junks. I've always wanted you to clear up all the mess in our room but now i want it to stay cos it's all i've left of you. I'm afraid that one day i shall come home and see the room to be so clean that it amplifies your absence cause those are the only things that still hold your smell . You're one of a kind and i know i can never find anyone just like you, someone who i can tell everything to, when i say everything i mean everything. Someone who will be there in the middle of the night when i'm crying my heart out. Now, I don't know who to look for when i want to just come home and tell someone about my day in school, about the boy that is making me insane, about the incidents that i won't forget, about my soccer training, about my classmates. A few months back, when you told me you were planning to go to the States , it seems like it would never happen , little did it jolt me that you were gna leave and i am suppose to be strong and live here on my own. I hate how nothing lasts forever . It really breaks my heart to see you go because you are like my own sister and and its painful not knowing how a future without you is gonna be like. p.s i downloaded skype just for you(God bless the technology). I know we have to move on cos life is constantly chaning and all i can do is to wish you well over there. Take care my dear, i really really hope we'll meet in December before you really go for good.I love you.

FUCK

2009-10-27T23:55:00.003+08:00

so pissed so tired so in need of someone to talk to.
so empty , so sleepy , so lethargic,
so joyless so heartbroken so puzzled so unworthy
so misplaced so want to live on another planet.
i hate how unfair life is, how cynical people get.
how no one understands no matter how hard they try.
how miserable how unloved how scarred.

BLACKANDGOLD

2009-10-24T14:14:00.001+08:00

ahh my fav video of all time i can watch this again and again.

WECOULDSTAYINTHISMOMENT

2009-10-24T13:23:00.003+08:00

im bored! x100000000000000000000000000000000000000
ahhhh the only thing i feel like doing right now is to number 1. pack up ,number 2.fly home.
I miss mom n dad so much, i miss my bro,the food ,my room, my dog,my tv.
BUT no, gg back home= forsaking my social life. Mom called just now to ask if I'm having anything on today and when i mentioned BBQ she went like WHY EVERYDAY GOT SMTH ON 1? That's the diff about life here and life back home. What i do when im in Indo is basically waking up at 7am(yes and it's a holiday), breakfast with mom n dad,send mom to work ,go home, sleep,watch tv,pick mom from work, lunch,walk in the woods on alternate days/watch tv, wait for dinner, dinner out sometimes,wedding dinner every weekend(i'm serious, i have no idea abt the population in that small town i live in ,but wedding occurs so often to the extent that 1 time my parents had to attend 5 weddings on a Sunday)watch tv,sleep. HOW EXCITING! but somehow, no matter how slowly, time passes well and fine.
I promise! promise myself that this holiday(which is a month away, but it feels like 1 now), is going to be spent wisely and meaningfully.
Firstly, i'll knit something out
Then, i'll study!
and read a really good book!
also, drive well.
and DON'T GAIN WEIGHT!
plus GO JAKARTA!!! and find my dearest SHIERREN whom i miss like God know's how, and FINELLA who's leaving me in no time ( It feels like your boyf is gna leave u ok , it sucks im so used to seeing her everyday that i can't even stand the fact that she is out to town now, let alone US next yr, i think i'll just die and kill myself) and then my cousin and his very wonderful girlfriend nonetheless.
and i feel like flying to Kalimantan to find my mini cousins and to spend some time with my grandparents.
I'm not planning to argue or get into a fight with my parents this time round( it happened for a night the other time and it sux so much i won't let it happen again)
I can't wait for my Vietnam and Thailand trip too! whoo i hope i can get some awesome stuffs home from Bangkok.
Also, i wna ask koko to let me play soccer with his friends so that i can brush up my mediocre soccer skills(provided he dun mind)
Did i miss anything out? I don't think so.
AND I WNA CELEBRATE HALLOWEEN WITH ABCDE! hurry decide whr to go eh ppl cos i wna got with my hostel peeps too!=D
ahhh life's wonderful.

YOUGAVEMESOMETHINGICOULDHOLDONTO

2009-10-19T22:52:00.003+08:00

Below are pictures of loots from Hajilane and us crashing spotlight to relive old times ,when we would do goofy things together. We used to have the chance to spend everyday together, the privilege to sing out of the blue together ,but now we only meet up like once a month. But it is still a blessing nonetheless, cause there's no awkwardness or whatsoever and we stil couldn't get enough of one another that we really want a sleepover soon. Watched Julie&Julia, its really nice, worth the 6 bux but one thing that i still don't quite understand is why would Julia hate Julie? There's practically no reason for her to bear hatred towards someone with such a good nature, especially when Julie is an avid fan of Julia. Well, unless they twist and turn the true story, which is very unlikely.

IWILLNEVERBERIGHT

2009-10-18T11:03:00.002+08:00

it's a good thing we don't always get what we desire for.

ahhh! i know how i can kill time before meeting up with mandy n eun for what the flea. watch my tristan n isolde dvd=DDD

bepatientpray

2009-10-13T05:38:00.002+08:00

penis.penis.penis.penis.penis.penis!SHHHH!!!

WHATISTHE1stTHINGTHATYOUNOTICEWHENYOULOOKATANOTHERGIRL

2009-10-11T09:43:00.006+08:00

Whoa whoa! look at her face, brimming with love and happiness=D Me: Kelly can you pls don't be stupid
Kelly: hehe hehe hehemeet kelly! the librarian!The super duper happy girl hehehehehe=PPP
Judging from how serious i look when i knit, you may wna see how the end product looks like. But don't bother ok, my knitting is an epic failure.

THATSHE'SNOTYOU

2009-10-11T08:46:00.005+08:00

I think i should stop doing this to this space, spamming it with pictures and then leave it hanging there breathing for some form of decent writing. I mean if i want to upload pics, for goodness sake i should just mass upload it on facebook tag everyone in it, makes life so much easier. But then again, not everybody reads my blog, they glance through it and when people do that they only see pictures.Who comes here anyway? Mardhiah? Nat? haha! Oh yea i think uploading pics on my blog serves the need of ppl like Mard who is to cool for fb=P ok fine moving on, above are pics of my pe elective which was cable skiing. It was really thrilling but it was the cause my current misery, the ache that has been lingering arnd for days . My arms , neck , shoulder , tummy are all facing abject pain and its so fruststrating the fact that i have to climb up to my double decker bed to sleep every single night. School resumes tomorrow and i hate this rush of fear that is engulfing every minute of my Sunday. Oh ytd was bbq at debi's and we bullied her. For those who wna c debi's wretched situation , wait up till eunice uploads it on facebook=P hehehe...

SOMEBODYCALL911

2009-10-08T07:22:00.002+08:00

I hate it when people put me on a pedestal, my family and friends. By doing so , they never knew how intimidated i could feel, how worried and afraid i really am. Its always the same brave front i put,I don't know why but that's just the way it is. Even when ranting, my countenance would still be of a 'im-so-sure-of-myself'.

Moving on, im actually getting my life back. Having more me time n friends time but PW continues to haunt.The past days have been busy, but in a more positive way because at least i was enjoying myself.Went for bash in MJ 2 nights ago and everybody was burning on the dance floor tho it took quite a while before everyone warmed up and get hyped, but once they're in it, its hard to get out , that always happens right?BUT , my feet hurts like hell cos i spent a substantial amnt of time on the dance floor with my heels and gosh it was sore and painful, and I was having a whale of a time I didnt want to stop. A few already went barefooted but the prospect of having to walk out of the crowd to remove mine is way too troublesome and I din want to miss any of the songs. Oh i went out to get a drink n a 5sec seat , i was untying my oxfordlace when when BEP's I got a feeling blasted ,HEHEHE so we ran back in . Honestly, i was rather skeptical about the whole mambojambo night, but it didn't dissapoint.

Went catch FAME yesterday after school with A , lu , wen , soonhao and kenneth. Kinda impromptu cos it was suppose to be just me n mandy watching time traveller's wife or surrogate.
Well FAME was erm 5/10 kinda movie? ya the dance moves were awesome and all the soundtracks are pretty pleasing but the storyline sucked! At least i didn't really like it. And to make things worse there were no eyecandies to drool over, that made a 8/10 movie drop to 5/10 instantly! Ok no , i was just kidding. hehehe

So today being marking day , Im hanging out with Mich , Kel , Mie. We are gonna get some knitting supplies at plaza sing and then Kel's gonna teach me how to knit. Im not certain if i'll like the whole mundane knitting activity but we'll see=) I really really wna catch 500 days of summer but i'll leave that to saturday;)

Tomorrow i'll be cable skiing whoooo!!! I cnt wait to experience such thrill but then again i doubt i would be able to do alot since its only a 4 hour workshop. Nevertheless, it smth new=) And then on Saturday it'll be a day i've been waiting for ! Out to town with my ABDE. And after that we'll be hvng a bbq at D's=)Below is this song from Fame which is beautiful. Try listening for those who havent got a taste of it.

And OMG, my roomate just ran off for her N lvl paper. Its 750 now and her ppr starts at 8. Her school is at Tanah Merah and we're leaving near PP, she better reach there on time. I woke her up just now to ask what time was her paper and she mumbled 10. Little did i know she was unconscious when she answered me.

BOYWHYYOUSOOBSSESEDWITHME

2009-10-07T18:54:00.007+08:00

mambo jambo was a night to remember

THESUNHASRISENITSTIMETOSLEEP

2009-10-06T15:12:00.002+08:00

i tell you why 'hate' holds such a strong meaning.

i hate to love you = hate

i love to hate you= hate

have you ever noticed?

.in the end you're all alone in this world because not everyone has a soulmate.

you'resogoodwithwordsbutsobadatkeepingthem

2009-10-05T17:53:00.001+08:00

what if what if what if

i don't get promoted.=(?

pray for me everybody

YOUANDMEFLESHTOFLESH

2009-09-21T08:08:00.002+08:00

my body clock is screwing up right before the-event-that-should-not-be-mentioned (as it only brings sadness and ruin everybody's prefect day)
is it because of the constant indulgence in coffee? the costernation of what's coming soon ? or the exhilaration that today may bring? or perhaps the constant yearning for this part of my life to fast forward?
so fatigued . so vexed . so enervated .

IGOTYOUREMAILSYOUJUSTDON'TGETFEMALESNOWDOYOU?

2009-09-20T09:49:00.005+08:00

If there's a plane or a bus leaving dallas
I hope you're on it
If there's a train moving fast down the tracks
I hope you caught it

Cause I swear out there ain't where you ought to be
So catch a ride, catch a cab
Don't you know I miss you bad
But don't you walk to me

Baby run, cut a path across the blue skies
Straight in a straight line
You can't get here fast enough

Find a truck and fire it up
Lean on the gas and off the clutch
Leave dallas in the dust
I need you in a rush
So baby run

If you ain't got a suit case
Get a box or an old brown paper sack
And pack it light or pack it heavy
Take a truck, take a chevy
Baby just come back

There's a shortcut to the highway out of town
Why don't you take it
Don�t let that speed limit slow you down
Go on and break it

Baby run, cut a path across the blue skies
Straight in a straight line
You can't get here fast enough

Find a truck and fire it up
Lean on the gas and off the clutch
Leave dallas in the dust
I need you in a rush
So baby run

Baby run
Oh baby run
Baby run

17SEPTEMBER2009

2009-09-17T23:20:00.011+08:00

Well im officially 18! And all i could say is THANK YOU ! really! to all my friends that had painstakingly surprised me through out the whole of 17 Sept just to make me feel special. I did not expect it to be so awesome . Let me give you a brief a summary of my very special day.

So, what happened just before the clock striked 12 Debi called me, to talk nonsence and pester me( she was part of a plot), but me being Debi intolerant forced her to put down the phone , and she panicked HAHAHA. Then when it was almost 12! Wayne smsed! He hasn't missed a single of my birthday and had consecutively, unfailingly become the 1st to wish me.(altho he always cheat, like sms u at 1158pm kind), so a big thank you Wayne! And then the rest of the sms started to flood in (i think cos everyone is sleeping late mugging for promos). But at about 1205 or so i received a phone call from Eun, she was trying to put up an act but it semi-failed, cause her giggles gave way. I was asked to look out of my bedroom window and what i saw made me tear instantly. There on the swimming pool ( from the distance of being on the 14th floor) i saw a heart shape thingy glowing . I was just so overwhelmed, taken aback and happy! I couldn't believe my eyes srsly. So, wanting the moment to last forever i grabbed my camera trying to take a snapshot of the view, only to find out that it's batteries are flat. Ugh! So i just made my way down and there Eun , Mandy , and my roomate who had dissapeared from my room for about half an hour ,were waiting. And they were wearing pink for me! and guess what! the floating things where 18 pink balloons that was taped to lightstix, how sweet=) and then they prepared apple struddels and a mega card which is darn funny. So after a series of camwhoring they left and i made my way up, to expect nothing else.

then we blew up 18 balloons and made a shape with light sticks and it was all a mad rush like "FUCKFUCKFUCK ITS 11.40PM" and we made Debi call her at 11 plus to talk to her and keep her awake so she wouldnt fall asleep and spoil our surprise. Later Tander told us that Debi just kept ranting on and on and on and was very annoying HAHA could tell she was totally panicking la! She even had to resort to being completely random and talking about A* oh noz. and Finella came down to help us out abit!So the plan was that I would call her at 12midnight: "Hi Tander!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Am I the first?! Anyway im so sorry that we can't celebrate your birthday with you (to which C said: it's okay i wasnt expecting anything anyway - which made me dangggg happy no expectations = mega surprise) but it's okay Im thinking of you if you look out your window now and see the moon im looking at it too and thinking of you and wishing you a happy birthday. Oh, can't find the moon ah nevermind lor look at the ground"but fuck i started laughing nonstop because when i was about to say the cheesy line i turned around and saw Amanda panicking like a dog 'SHIT EUN CAN YOU HURRY UP THE THING'S ABOUT TO SINK' and i just cracked up and couldnt stop. Totally spoiled the mood i was like 'OMG HOLD ON CAN YOU LET ME CALM DOWN FIRST" to Tander and i really couldnt stop. between the shaking laughter i managed to get through the message of "look our your window" and she did."OMG. AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK OUT THE WINDOW? SHIT WHAT'S THAT? OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGG im going to cry. (starts crying) omggggg im damn touched is everyone downstairs? ya i can see it clearly shit im going to take a picture"which she didnt. but she was surprised nonetheless to see this!! (from EUN's LJ!)

But, the hostel girls surprised me! They barged into the room accompanied by a birthday song! and guess what cake they bought ? the IKEA daim choc cake i had been dying to try and gosh it was hell of a cake! I was so touched n i felt kinda bad cause all of them was in the middle of their slumber, but they forfeited their sleep just to celebrate my special day. So, i rushed them to sleep , before i have to be responsible to any of them being late the next day.

Ok, so what happened in the morning was my class singing birthday song for me when i least expected it. I was walking into the LT for assembly when they started to clap their hands, I was really stunned=P haha (Thomas said he thought smth exploded when they started clapping which i find quite hilarious) Then we went to the canteen to indulge in oreo cheesecake! specially baked by our very own YILU and WEN and it taste really good ok! They are taking orders! And they went into such a hassle just to make my day , cos Yilu told me how she adventured in supermarkets in search for vanilla essence at the last minute and her cousin had to drive her there. They stayed up quite late to bake that yummy thing, im touched beyond words =) And who would expect Parsons to come in with a bengawan solo cake during chrystal lesson to celebrate me n Mel's bday! That was really sweet of him. And oh! not forgetting Firza n Mard who were so thoughtful cos they bought me pink polkadot stationaries and a pink ribbon clip, thank you so much! i love it! Mard even dedicated a post for me on her tumblr and i screenshot it just to make sure it can be my wallpaper=P Bought SUBWAY cookies for the girls at home on the way home, which i was glad ,put a smile on their faces=) Oh the next thing is EPIC, cause i walked in to my room , to find a huge bouquet of miniature sunflowers in assorted colours wrapped up prettily in pink taking a large portion of my desk, waiting for me to embrace it. It was gorgeous! THANK YOU MICHELE KOE! What more,she delivered it right to my doorstep! Approaching the end of MY day , my guardian surprised me further with pizza hut! and i ate 2 slices gosh! I kept telling myself that it was ok cos it was my birthday afterall ehehe! From today onwards(now its alrd 1223am of 18sept), im not gonna consume fried stuffs or eat excessively and i'm gonna start mugging like and MJ student(quoted from Nat's msg) ahaha! Really a big thank you to those who wished me through SMS, FB , face-to-face and those who spent so much time to make my day so wonderful.Ok this isn't actually a summary cos its way long, but my day was just too fabulous. btw, HAPPY BIRTHDAY HUIMEI! As usual im passing down my throne to her=)

ITHINKITMADESENSE,WHATYOUSAIDLASTNIGHT.SO,GOODBYE.

2009-09-13T20:07:00.001+08:00

food porn.

GOSHPLEASE!ONLYWAKEMEUPWHENSEPTEMBERENDS

2009-09-11T22:54:00.005+08:00

I swear im going back during every holidays from now on

because everything except for loneliness and insecurities wouldn't retain while the rest of the available divine emotions set out to desert me.

Everyday, i planned out my to-do-list only to end up not following it.

In between words i write or read would be imagination or desires long to be fulfilled failing me of my attempt to do any productive or proper studying.

And the desolation grew much worse when i don't know who to turn to because everyone else have their wearisome commitments to attend to and i know i am in no position to disturb or intervene.

I'm aware that my social life won't be as satisfying back home but it's home afterall and i miss my parents oh so badly, i can't wait for 21st to run to me because apparently i'm too tired to move .

On a lighter note i bought focaccia today, just to make sure tomorrow won't be as dreary.

SPLENDIDSPLENDIDSPLENDID

2009-09-04T22:58:00.003+08:00

Ok, so what's really bothering me right now is my viet-thai trip at the end of the year. Im being really skeptical because 1st and foremost, i had to sacrifise my much-anticipated aussie trip. 2ndly, i will only be in Thai for 2 freaking days , tell me how productive can it get? But Wen gave me a glimmer of hope today by assuring me that Vietnam is gonna be fun, it wont be as bad as it sound, so we'll see. Thirdly, i haven't had a single idea of the itinerary because Mom did all the booking in Indonesia, so im like completely clueless, expecting the trip to be ... nth to expect to be exact really. And i hate to go on tour, i really like the thrill of exploring a place myself(taking my own sweet time) but Mom being mom, will never ever do that. It's her policy to travel in comfort. Moreover, we are going with her friends, which means i have to be obidient the whole trip, which is kinda hard because i tend to throw tantrums occasionally. To aggravate my grief further is the fact that I really wna take lots of photos but im not equipped with a decent camera to begin with(unless my bro willingly offers his d60), plus 1 more thing, i'm not gonna have any camwhore buddy. Well, mom coaxed me by saying that her friend's daughter(whom i used to play hide-and-seek with btw) is coming along, which is obviously not the reason why i gave in to her . I mean it would be so awkward cos there wont be any common topic between us( don't get me wrong she is a nice girl). So, i presume to play safe, i'm gonna bring along a really good book to be a dependable companion, and not forgetting to update my ipod with good juicy music. Don't blame me for being so pessimistic, I was just hoping for a really good trip after one hell of a promo which is screwing me up down left right.Really.

WTH

2009-09-04T22:50:00.003+08:00

f la i cnt write any single shit despite being exposed to $@^#*&#*%@.

IWANNABEYOURLASTFIRSTKISS

2009-08-31T18:28:00.005+08:00

It's nights like these that you hope would last and make you realise maybe life don't suck after all. We were sitting by the river , with leaps of music surrounding the atmosphere, talking bout minute things in life and not forgetting passing on kindness to people around.We had a Nick and Norah's night, but too bad our playlist weren't infinite because we left for home early, much much earlier than nick and norah. Baybeats was an eye opener=D

AREYOUGONNAFIGHTFORME?

2009-08-31T18:20:00.002+08:00

I have no inspiration therefore i don't feel writing much for this particular post. Not saying that the whole visiting CCH thing wasn't fun or what, but im just plain lethargic.

YOUREACLASSICLIKEANLBD

2009-08-31T17:56:00.002+08:00

Teachers' Day celebration for the 1st time in MJ was okay, kinda interesting actually. But it seems like all celebration in JC are v v informal and more laid-back ,which i find isn't really smth to frown about.Thanks for those who contributed the foooood the games and the laughter of course.

BRIGHTEST

2009-08-29T11:21:00.004+08:00

Have you ever seen Singapore from those angles, in those light? Perhaps not, cause everyone seems to be so busy with their troubles and duties that none of us actually stopped to see how things glide, and how some remained stationary. I find the time lapse video pretty amazing and it makes me think how lucky i am to be among those lights. Nonetheless, I agree wholeheartedly with those who thinks this society is one that is of a pinnacle of an effed up life. I see so many of my friends ,those from overseas treating Singapore just like a stepping stone for them to reach another place, further away from where they came from, and i have to admit i want to do that too. But whenever i think of the consequences of leaving a place i've come to be so familiar with, leaving even more of my beloved behind and the fact that there is a possibility everything would be a fiasco in my next destination, i become afraid. But there's a little voice inside me that could get really loud sometimes, telling me that i need to experience things that i won't be able to get in this place im standing on. I do not mind making new friends at all but I hate the feeling.I detest such dilemmas.

EVERYTHINGSEEMSPERFECTFROMFAR

2009-08-23T18:32:00.007+08:00

Saturday flea finds:

My sunday was spent lying on the bed, my legs tangled in the blanket, exploring Wuthering Heights and sipping warm home-made/ self-made milk tea ,done altogether with the company of the best cover of Such Greath Heights(not pun intended with the book i was immersed in), and not too mention the air outside was perfect because it was raining. An afternoon spent in solitude was indeed a perfect misanthropist heaven.

source: ohmayonnaise.lj

IFONLYIWASBRAVE

2009-08-22T21:57:00.003+08:00

image source: alissainwonderland.bs

“Go be that starving Artist you’re afraid to be. Open up that journal and get poetic finally. Volunteer. Suck it up and travel. You were not born here to work and pay taxes. You were put here to be part of a vast organism to explore and create. Stop putting it off. The world has much more to offer than what’s on 15 televisions at TGI Fridays. Take pictures. Scare people. Shake up the scene. Be the change you want to see in the world. You’ll thank yourself for it.”
-Jason Mraz

HERADIATESCHARM

2009-08-15T11:21:00.000+08:00

YOU'RESOPLEASANTIWANTYOUFORMYOWN

2009-08-15T09:40:00.005+08:00

What im glad i have:

What i would gladly have:

CATCHME

2009-08-14T23:36:00.002+08:00

source:the english muse

But you're so hypnotising

You got me laughing while i sing

You got me smiling in my sleep

And I can see this unraveling

And your love is where im falling

But please dont catch me

See this heart

Wont settle down

Like a child running scared from a clown

l'm terrified of what you'll do

my stomach screams just when I look at you.

JOSEPHGORDONLEVITT

2009-08-11T21:04:00.008+08:00

JOYCELYN ALL OF US MISS YOU TRUCKLOADS. WE SO WISHED YOU WERE THERE. PLEASE PLEASE SPARE US SOME OF YOUR PRECIOUS TIME. I WANT TO TALK TO YOU SO DO THEY AND IM CAPSing THIS COS I KNOW YOU DON'T COME TO MY BLOG NMORE AND I JUST HOPE THIS CAN CATCH YOUR EYE(if you happen to drop by maybe tonight). If only i could turn back time, i would make you swear that you wont neglect us like that=( i still love you...

btw, did i mention UP! is worth every single cent and all of my time.

YOUPAINTTHEPERFECTSUMMERPICTURE

2009-08-10T11:00:00.003+08:00

Attention all! This movie seems as awesome as the book(despite the fact i was to weak to finish it cos it was complicated how they throw u to 1993 to 1987 and so on). I can't wait !!!

Bloody men are like bloody buses

You wait for about a year

And as soon as one approaches your stop

Two or three others appear.

You look at them flashing their indicators,

Offering you a ride.

You're trying to read their destinations,

You haven't much time to decide.

If you make a mistake,

there is no turning back

.Jump off, and you'll stand there and gaze

While the cars and the taxis and lorries go by

And the minutes, the hours, the days.

By Wendy Cope.

YOU'RELEAVINMEHANGING

2009-08-08T13:58:00.010+08:00

Guess who I met at swapandshop and StJames last sunday! hahaha it was utterly unexpected, especially when Me , Mie , and Mich was just talking bout Kim! and then taaa daaa we saw her! It was a totally coincidental and it's really cool to meet some of em=)

And then, who would expect i will bump into ahlin!!! hahaha i was jumping for joy when i caught sight of her, cause i miss her big time. But she was sick=( thus she did not express how happy she is to see me, her reaction totally don't match her feelings cos i mean obviously she missed me alot too right!Hhehehe.But i caught her shopping alot! tsktsk...
This was yesterday! We were in the LT waiting to watch some Singapore-made documentary. Wen said ytd was a special day, so we have excuse to camwhore! hehehe, little did we know that Eleanor was sniggering behind trying to squeeze into the picture! MJ's national day celebration was not festive at all but i prefer it this way.

Btw, I sprained my toe due to Funfestique's soccer and that explains why i wont be too active this weekend. Went to the polyclinic just now and got a 1 week PE mc for the whole of next week but found out it would be redundant cos PE is cancelled from nxt week nway. But TRITON got 1st for soccer which was a total blessing cos we are not supposed to be 1st, Miranda was just pretty unlucky. I hope my toe gets well fast! please please...

TONIGHTYOULOOKSOPRETTY

2009-08-01T09:15:00.005+08:00

KEL'S 11! KEL's 17!

THEANFIELDEXPERIENCE

2009-07-27T20:41:00.009+08:00

LAST NIGHT WAS ehhh...let me find the right words... hmmm hmmm I DON'T KNOW! AWESOMESHIT!and that word isn't impactful enough obviously. Especially when you watch your favourite team play live! like you're basically breathing the same air as likes of TORRES and CARRAGHER and ALONSO and AGGER(who hugged afiqah!!! if im her i can just faint on the spot).So ya we camped there, under the blistering hot sun by 4pm but somehow with the crowd around you time passed by so damn quickly. ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU BULLY 2 HELPLESS, POWERLESS MANURE FAN!Btw right, all pictures below are just like ehmmm 1/3 of it. Cos i v lazy to resize and stuff, so maybe another day.

We picked our fav players and stood near em, and Gerrard's my baby's dad so obviously right.Carrying Nat's loots. and Yoguru at hand!Like in ANFIELD RIGHT!SCHOLES! SHEESH... so this guy kukoo, come liverpool match wear man u jersey. Dno should call him brave or dumb but since he is a Man U fan, i choose dumb.But at least he was sporting and smiling(like kahqi's dumb kinda smile) and agreed when asked to change to a Singapore jersey.

For his own safety, he was escorted, cos some of us were really scary luh like taunting him.

Then we spotted another one! he used the towel to cover his lowly man u badge, but still the crowd smelled something funny, i mean manure is smelly what! So he got escorted out as well , we all cheered when he left!notice the head!We sang our hearts out for LFC!

I looked damn fugly in all the shots la but aiya even handsome ppl like Torres have their ugly moments, so i should embrace my ugliness too.whoo!The winning banner! and his extravaluable prize below!

Notice the rather vacant stadium, a few hours ltr, it was all filled up, and in the meantime i shall resize the rest of my pictures.

I LOVE LIVERPOOL FOREVER!!!

ONCEUPONADAYDREAM

2009-07-26T11:57:00.004+08:00

Above is picture of D! I help u edit ok, nice not?

The usual weekly flea we attend, now i kinda miss shopping malls. Cravings to go ION again=(

DAYWITHANEXCELENTWEATHER

2009-07-24T22:35:00.006+08:00

Amidst the chaos and stressful life, it is only normal for someone to dream to have breakfast so tempting.
at a place so beautifulor slumber peacefully in tranquilityand have beautiful kitchens with ever-ready utensils to prepare good food
and to enjoy pretty toilets that looks as grand as your bedroom
and have a dwelling facing breathtaking views like these
And in summertime, spend the days like these or even trying to grow things that creates smile .

"This life... is what you make it. No matter what you're going to mess up sometimes, it's a universal truth. But the good part is, you get to decide how you're going to mess it up. Girls will be your friends - they'll act like it anyway. But just remember, some come, some go. The ones that stay with you through everything - they're your true best friends. Don't let go of them. Also remember, sisters make the best friends in the world. As for lovers, well, they'll come & go too. & babe, I hate to say it, most of them - actually pretty much all of them are going to break your heart. but you can't give up because if you give up, You'll never find your soul mate. You'll never find that half who makes you whole. & that goes for everything; Just because you fail once, doesn't mean you're gonna fail at everything. Keep trying, hold on, & always, always, always believe in yourself. Because if you don't, then who will, sweetie? So. Keep your head high. Keep your chin up. & most importantly, keep smiling. Because life's a beautiful thing & there's so much to smile about."- Marilyn Monroe

I SAW MASCHERANO AND ARBELOA!( i know this disrupted the melancholic tune of this post but i just wna mention it=))

YOUCANNEVERSAYNEVER

2009-07-23T19:34:00.003+08:00

I really really hope we'll stick with each other as time goes by,through thick and thin, and of course get through the horrible JC life together. Then we'll take the world by storm and do things we like , like fleaing without a worry and dance to many many songs and take photos with pretty clothes at awesome places.I can't wait for another trip just like the Penang one, and for that to come true we really have to study real hard and prove to them we are worthy of all the time that we are gonna enjoy.

Debi's dad: why you'll always together one ah? Go JC no new friends ah?

...

Then again how do we get better ones once we've got the best?

SOMETIMESLOVECOMESAROUND

2009-07-22T23:49:00.003+08:00

i don't feel like blogging but alot had happened.
ok well maybe not alot.
don't get me wrong i did not have a bad day.
or had a bad week.
in fact i love this week, or to be more precise today.
i'm just gonna type out all of the random things.
i think ION orchard is awesome.
i saw Kobe Bryant.
im not so excited over the match on sunday cos Gerrard is NOT coming
and Torres is NOT playing, thus i feel cheated.
i got an early birthday present from mama , n i absolutely love it.
i ate alot. went to dian xiao er n sunwithmoon for dinner.
i wna eat the food mama brought from indo, tomorrow.
i like the book im reading currently.
i think i should not shop anymore.
i wna get promoted.
i wna be slim.
my heart don't beat at the sight of him anymore, though i admit small glances are unavoidable.
i like 'knock you down' cover by lilcdawg.
sorry sorry dance was funny!
good night.

BLOGGINGWHILEMUNCHINGONPEANUTBUTTERBANANABREAD

2009-07-12T09:23:00.015+08:00

Because i did not think before i act, therefore all the photos are not in order of my Saturday, a very very eventful Saturday.1stly! the loots i got from flea! i love em all=DDD and some of em , i really got it at dirt cheap price.$8 hairband, chio bo?earrings at 3 bucks a pairbangle! $4 only! bu de bu grab HAHAHAahhh my long awaited=) while the rest are wearing red 1s, yilu and i felt that the green 1 was handsome looking as well! So each of us bought 1 today for only 69 cos it was on sale!(not in the flea obviously)

$15 vintage top

ahhh this 1 super cheap! another bu de bu grab item! 10 bucks only and its versatile and sequined=DD

ok so moving on...We celebrated my maid's birthday as well cos she is an awesome woman. An awww i think she was touched, cos she din expect we'd do this for her. She even forgot it was her birthday! Fin wasnt in the picture because she was watching some korean guys video on youtube which got her hysterical. She was laughing like in a really scary manner and we could hear her from the living room while we took this group photo and all of us were dumbfounded. You guys should hear it.

And now its the SC EXCO BBQ! wheeee which we partied from night to morning!!! ok just kidding, its just the pictures. Manage to caught up alot=) here's an update.

Yijie- Stil manly! ahaha .helped us start the fire=D and i realise cos she was dng most of the cooking, she is hardly in any pictures. sorry yijie!Cherie- Still as chio as ever and noisy. However she claimed that instead of being a queen bee , she is now a worker bee.

XianKai- Still haunting Cherie ( D said that to get rid of XianKai, the only way is to reincarnate HAHAHA) and is now in dragonboat! And came up with a theory that girls who wear JC skirts with legs like stick doesnt look nice, which made me damn happy cos my legs aren't skinny! whoo!

Qingru- Still as motherly , see she bbqd for us=) oh and instead of being in the demure guzheng cca she is now in TAEKWONDO! cool not? So now Kevin quite scared of her alrd hehehe.

Oh and HuiJun n Zhenming became dancers! like hiphop kind hahaha! like wear bling bling type. That's them practising some moves, oh n not forgetting HuiJun has got a new boyf from HC which Debi is craving for.(of course not the same guy la but D wants some HC guy)

Food Glorious Food! The prawn ah... Juicy i tell u!

Tander- eh as glutton as ever.Alicia- ahhh i miss Alicia! hahaha still so nice and funny! Debi- ok lets not talk bout Debi. HAHAHA

Camy- came with a big scar , ouch! take care nxt time babe. Shiwee- came with a new haircut which i think looks cute on her.Nat- as you can see , wore and ACJC tee which she is damn proud of .She just wna taunt us haha, but the tee did wonders!(like getting a cheaper price at a stall in the flea ran by ACJC girls). And oh ya not forgetting her usual groove.Oh btw i learnt from Nat smth damn cool. "NSK" . Like her sch ppl always say "wa dat person super NSK" hahaha! (quite mean but v funny).

Katie- SCANDALOUS! 6 guys jioed her !(i think my life really damn sad HAHAHA) but sadly all damn hiong and loserish 1 haha so all rejected. booo.The otah was damn good! dammmnnnnnnnnnn goood!

Alphonso- still looks like Alphonsus, which i always have the urge to say hi to, but somehow manage to control myself.

eeeeeee who is that guy in blue? who who? i wonder who.

That's all folks!=D

NIGHTFEST2009

2009-07-11T02:01:00.003+08:00

woani, wish you were with us=(

get well soon.

GOTAWAYWITHSOMEMISTAKESINLOVE

2009-07-09T21:19:00.004+08:00

Ok so honestly, how many of you just love the sound of the beeping of the scanner when u scan your books in the library? and how many of you just love the stomp of the chops, when the librarian does it to the book you were gonna borrow. Its so unfamiliar now cos everything is becoming more and more modern and i'm just too old to be actually indulging in such childish activities. I came across that library kit a few seconds ago and felt nostalgic right away! yes, i was a librarian for hmmm 2 years?in my pri sch, and loved every moment of it, ok well maybe not the shelving books part. But even before becoming a librarian in school , being a librarian was a childhood roleplay. In p2 , i remember often going to my then best friend Olga's house to just hang around, and we will often gather all her books ,tear little pieces of paper n paste on the 2nd page of it for the due dates. Oh we were so in love with the game , even if we had to mimick the "beep" sound of the scanner whenever we scan the books. If only that kit existed when my fantasy was stil of such.

ASFARASISHOULDFOLLOW

2009-07-03T11:00:00.003+08:00

i know he is hot but you don't go and take what belongs to your friend ok=) so lay off.haha!

QUEENA:BIRTHDAY

2009-06-29T08:07:00.011+08:00

LETS WELCOME THE QUEEN

.and friends

like on a front row of a fashion show heheobserving the modelsss...

and of the show and walking away with goodie bags while having the papz tailing you

THE AFTERPARTY!

I personally like how candid this shot turned out, if only eunice was in it , it would be in the frame.

DEBI was most high in teoheng.HAHAHA THE NIGHT WAS STILL YOUNG SO ...

we goofed arnd and ate desserts=) it was comparable to that day where all of us wore dresses and we practically went all arnd singapore in high spirits. Im already craving for a day like this to happen in again=(

IDAREDYOUTOKISSMEINTHERAIN

2009-06-26T08:43:00.005+08:00

Perhaps waking up too early in the morning makes your thoughts run wild or makes you think more logically. But a piece of my mind that i would like to share is the realisation i made that eveything loses its lustre after a while.And things that don't seem too perfect at the moment might me the thing that you don't want to let go at all.I'm sure all of us had come across something in the mall that we fell in love with at 1st sight and while looking at the price tag , we become devastated. But as human beings, and in my case , girls , we save up n buy it, for some lucky ones out there you don't even have to accumulate the sum of money.And while purchasing that item , you missed out other versatile pieces that would be much more worthwhile but which will soon loses its lustre as well. Then you go home and feel all excited about wearing the item you've purchased and realises after the 1st use, it doesnt look that fantastic anymore.

...

Ever fall in love with someone? If you did, then you'd understand the things i typed. When you are infatuated, at 1st thought you'd think that everything falls in place just for you and him , you crave, lust and is head over heels for him, so sure that he is the one that you would wna go on a roadtrip with. But after a few days/months/years , it just dawn on you that no, he is not worth all your longing and attention.

...

How about a singer ? actor? footballer?song? How many of them have we gone gaga over but at the end of the year, do they matter? Do we glorify them as much as we use to? In short, nothing last forever. We move on. So now, before doing anything which you think would be worth everything, think again.

...

On a random yet major note, i'm not allowed to be in school for the next 7 days because I just came back from Indonesia yesterday , just a few days ago my country joined the rest of the affected countries.This also means i MIGHT be skipping mid years=D

...

Also,today bestie turned 17. I want her to know that despite my attitude and insensitivity at times, i do love her and that she mean the world to me.

...

p.s i miss home and all the boring things that comes with it.

BACKFROMVACATION

2009-06-22T16:06:00.003+08:00

My dream house.

I'm back from Jakarta! It was just moderately fun cos it was more of like rest and relax kinda trip instead of the hectic shopping on every mall kinda trip. I accomodated at my ex-roomate's hse and her family villa at the mountain. The weather was so good up on the mountain , I wished i can move up and stay there. And her villa is located in Kota Bunga which has like houses with different concept and while taking a walk i found my favourite! Btw my friend's villa was warm and cosy too and it faces a huge lake ! So we had dinner at night with her relatives while enjoying the magnificent view , the cool and crisp weather and of course not forgetting the gastronomic delight of Indonesia and her family's warm hospitality.And that's abt it,meanwhile, I shall go unpack my things.

It's hard to make a conversation

When he's taking my breath away

I should say'Hey, by the way'

You're beautiful, every little piece, love

Don't you know, you're really gonna be someone

Ask anyone

And when you find everything you looked for

I hope your life leads you back to my front door

Oh, but if it don't, stay beautiful.

APERFECTLYGOODHEART

2009-06-15T21:20:00.003+08:00

yay! 1st time blogging with the phone.Chose e75 in the end. Forget my previous post , i actually slept with proper bedsheets n blanket n ate my dinner. Thanks for all who listened and cared. My great gma is in a comma right now, the doctor said her brain shrinked and its really difficult for her to pull through. A few days before she went into a comma she randomly asked her picture taken with my great gpa n asked him to sing for her, i hate it when old ppl leave their partners behind,especially when they are the sweetest couple.I took a walk in the woods today and found it pleasantly pretty.

SICKOFTHEDRAMA

2009-06-14T18:47:00.003+08:00

guess i won't be hvng dinner tonight,

or sleep with a blanket and proper bedsheets.

so sick of being bossed arnd and trampled on and ganged upon.

i need to talk to my girlfs so darn badly.

BABYYOU'REMYLIGHT

2009-06-08T14:27:00.005+08:00

It dawned upon me that i havent blogged abt the N.E journey and since im the N.E rep i shld be cool and blog abt it hehe. It was well ermmm not really educational i guess but we sure enjoyed the time spent as a class. Was being picky abt where to eat at 1st but decided to walk from tanjong pagar all the way to Lau Pa Sat to have lunch to fulfil our unbearable hunger. Then we made our way to RedDotDesign museum which was more or less icky but some things do wow us, like the fridge with crystals. And and the umbrella which i fell in love with and is planning to give out as wedding souveniers which is totally approriate. Most of us camwhored in the museum but i still think nothing can beat to camwhoring in National Museum. Then we proceeded to Shaw House to catch monsters vs alien which had a lousy story plot but still hilarious some of the time. I had no right to judge the movie actually cos i slept so soundly in the middle, hehehe.

I love this movie! it's really cool trust me. It's the kinda movie you would wna watch on a lazy day at home. Lying down on the bed while licking ferrero rocher and enjoying the songs n charm of michael cera made my day=) I know im lagged and stuff but im so glad that i actually caught it. I wna find love like them , its not over the top or melancholicly romantic , just candid and silly. where's fluffy!

i'll blog abt Diva La Futbol and my shopping outings with my roomates anthr day(when i get the images). toodles everyone gotta go out for lunch! i'm becoming a glutton because like what huimei said Indonesia is conducive for eating. And i really really wna go Jakarta=((( and i really really want my girlfriends to come along(wishful thinking). Oh and i really really wna get either an E71 or a BB, but most likely its E71 cos BB's to expensive and i will feel bad having to get my parents to purchase that.

p.s im really lonely here.

INTEGRITIAN

2009-06-07T19:08:00.004+08:00

The ultimate, irreplacable.

RISE.RULE.REIGN

2009-05-30T19:45:00.004+08:00

I've never taken dancing so seriously or miss dancing so badly. I've never been so willing to move so sharply to every twist and turn or tried so badly to smile when im dancing. I've never actually enjoyed dancing so much.

We got last for cheerleading, so what?

Like what Xavier said , we're champions at heart. When we rewatched our cheerleading videos , we were awestruck, questioning why why n why did we get last when we danced our hearts out.

We wept, reflected, complained , hugged , talked and soon enough realised that it was still worthwhile. The sole reason i joined cheerleading initially was that i did not want to be sitting in the gallery during Colosseum and be stuck in mundane situation . Now im so glad i put down my name on that piece of paper.

Trainings took alot of my time, reaching home at 1030 at night almost every night , sweating like a dog , not getting enought rest , breakouts. But never once i thought of it as pointless , and that was because of the experience i gained and the love i received n shared with my cheerleading mates.

I hardly knew any of them at the starting but as time goes by we became so close that we embraced each others' company so much. We created silly scandals , cared for one another , talk abt anything under the sun , whine together and groove to the bom bom bom music together. We rushed to community centres when the school is locked just to make sure we get things right before the real day. We encouraged and teach each other , laughed at comical movements we made especially Syukri's E.T moves.

And i know these are the group of people i'm damn glad i met, and the group of people that will be forever embedded in my memory especially when i think about my jc life.

Nabila , Xavier , Lishyan , Gaollible Ning , Bao Ze Dong ,Kenneth , Mini , JinPei ,Irdayu , Ashley ,Wafiy , Azmi , Syukri , Hoon , Rika , Amirul , Shiva , Steph , JenHun , Atiqah .

All the love in the world for ual!=D

p.s to those who wanna watch us groove, watch the video in my facebook!

IMSTANDINGONICE

2009-05-28T17:41:00.003+08:00

When soccer girls glam up for Visage.

And i should say , Meridian has got a pool of talents.

Every single dime spent on Visage was worthwhile.

You're beautifully dysfunctional.

Yet more dysfunctional than beautiful.

Now that i know

and my heart is still beating fast slowly.

It'll end, i promise.myself.

YOUDESTROYEDME

2009-05-25T23:16:00.002+08:00

Whatever happened ,shouldn't happen
Whatever shouldn't happen , happened.
I caught the smile i wanted so badly
but too bad it wasn't for me.Oh you don't know what a heart you've annihilate.
But i should say, there's no one to blame, not even you, just me.

YOUMAKETHEMGOODGIRLSGOBAD

2009-05-24T06:50:00.002+08:00

need i say more? GERRARD HERE I COME! wakaka ok i sound like a total psycho but then again its STEVEN GERRARD! +torres and the rest of the team. ITS LIKE A DREAM COME TRUE. And nat! don't worry i've scribbled stuffs on the pic above! see just in case some naughty people try to like print it out and use it=PPP Its such a huge responsibility to be carrying those around esp when 1 doesnt belong to me...

Visage is tonight! And i'll be attending it with my fantabulous soccer buddies! yay! n we're gna add an essence of blakc to whatever we're wearing tonight BUT none of us has a camera=( HOW!

Went for facial ytd, cried. Damn pain and now my face is still boiling red=( And i just spent a bomb on skincare. Those jerks on my face better be gone!

DOIT!

2009-05-21T01:08:00.000+08:00

It's 1:29 am but for the sake of my PW im still awake.SO PLEASE! DO MY SURVEY! as long as you are btwn the age of 13-21, residing in Singapore, just do it ok!
Even though you don't know me or whatsoever, i'll appreciate it=)
Click Here to take survey

YOUYESYOUINEEDATIMEMACHINE

2009-05-11T10:13:00.000+08:00

look damn fugly in those pics but oh well!

i miss tff.

me n huilin think we grew up, cos we're not afraid to walk alone anymore!=)

keep in touch tff.

i need you girls.

badly.

.i wanna time travel.

FUNNYHOWYOUDON'TKNOWYOUDOMAGIC

2009-05-09T14:40:00.000+08:00

You might think I don't look

but deep inside in the corner of my mind

I'm attached

to you

you don't know what you do

everytime you walk into the room

I'm afraid to move

I'm weak

it's true I'm just scared to know the answer

do you see me too?

do you even know you met me?

i won't give up on this feeling.

THEBRIDGEHADBURNEDDOWN

2009-05-08T17:17:00.001+08:00

I've been neglecting my blog , that i know, but school had really exhaust me.The PW P.I, cheerleading , soccer matches , assignments . It all sounds fun ya da ya da but yea because of those, i've been reaching home late religiously. Oh not forgetting NAPFA which tires me to the max but now that it's done it's all worth the effort and time i guess. Cheerleading , despite being really tiring , had made me discovered alot of friends in which im so glad to know.( See those pics below=) )And not to worry, im not the flyer , too heavy=P But sadly "soccer trainings" isn't included in my uber busy schedule as its the soccer season now, and the team are hvng matches which they've been dng really well. I havent played soccer for so long to the extend of forgetting that a "shin guard" is called shin guard.

This was weile's mini birthday celebration which occured 2 days ago. Happy birthday weile! and congrats for getting into house comm=) All the best ok weiwei!
This was a long time ago , but i guess i should just post it cos it's a rare outing for me n fin cos we hardly hang out. I see her face everyday that i would not want her to see in town=P haha kidding. Baby , i empathise what you're going through right now , pls know that i'm here for you always. Just cry to me if you need or just rant to me of whatever happened in school. I don't know why you're facing this when you're always giving in to people and i know that cos i've been living with you for 4 years now, and never once were you fighting with me even i get super bitchy and demanding. I know i've never said this to you but I enjoy living with you (minus the fact that you are super messy). I know who you are , really , and i love you the way you are. I hope your mess clears up soon. I understand how it feels cos i have a bunch of wonderful girlfriends as well and if i were to be in you situation , it would be hell for me. I know how they mean to you, but as puzzled as you , now I don't think they are worth all your time and kindness, you don't need friends like that. I understand i have no right to say any of these cos i dno them personally, but i know you , and i know you deserve better than that. i love you F.

Another thing i've realised is that how often my p school friends and I are meeting up this year and how glad i am about it! We caught up with alot of things and it's glad seeing everybody just like how we were in the past. Nothing much changed, Kelly is still the biggest joker of all time , Huimei is always indulging in food as usual and her latest fetish is camwhoring of course. Mich still talks like how she used to , as caring as ever . Thank God for everything that remains the same=)

These are the pics of the dinner spent at Eun's( as promised).

Yea, basically that's it. The week ahead will be as busy i guess. Hydrotherapy session , acjc concert ,some musical (I'm becoming artsy fartsy=P hehe) intense cheerleading practices , studies , soccer matches to watch . I think i'm meeting up with TFF tmrw for a flea market=D and to see ahlin's eyecandy ahaha! I have so much to listen i bet=) Im happy for you Joy! Kinda expecting that this would happen sooner or later hehe . I hope he is treating you well and both of you are enjoying and learning from the relationship.And then monday will be 09A201 outing at CLarke Quay's Settler's cafe, please turn up people!!! I'm anticipating. And there's so much to look forward to actually , especially in July! Liverpool is coming so DUH i'll be watching and then i'll be having cable skiing for PE electives with Wendy and Lucy. Oh and June holiday also mean i can go back home and chill but on the flipside there's GPP to work on and mid years=( argh! study C.

I love to be in love but it can get so annoying. I hate the fact that I'm always in love people that i don't personally know and it suck cos i'll be hearing all kinda news from my friends about him and ya there's nothing much i can do but listen. Love is so blind that even when i knew so much not-so-good things and that he is so high in demand , my heart stil refuses to give up. Sadly, im not as brave as other girls , i'll be so tongue tied if i were to talk to him and i think i might even stumble just walking past him. For now, all i can do is just pray and hope that one day he shall notice me existance.I know its stupid to say im in love, cos we havent even talked, but 'like' sounds too mediocre.

WHENALLYOUWANTEDISTOBEWANTED

2009-04-28T17:20:00.000+08:00

In your life you'll do things greater than dating the boy on the football team and rushing for PI.

2009-04-19T22:26:00.000+08:00

SHE'DRATHERBESEEINGDOGSMUNCHINGONLOLLIPOPS

The day began really well. I mean i thought i would be able to declare my Sunday productive and all but now i just don't feel good. Went to church w D early in the morning, caught up with her regarding some stuffs then procedeed to T3 mac to study with the rest of the girls, as you can see from the pic we did study but of course with a little gossiping once in a while. We were also deciding if we were gg to have dinner together until we received a msg from E's mom that we could go over to her house for a Korean dinner! (p.s it was so delicious and the portion was so overwhelming). That was the start fo the pitfall, I ATE TOO MUCH! ugh! dats why im feeling so damn sick and to add on to my struggle me and A took the wrong bus home, and rode all the way to Toa Payoh. It was so ulu i tell u! then there was this bangla walking in front of us who would stop occasionally and stare at us. We thus discussed of what we should do IF he comes to attack us,and of course i will aim at his dick.Oh and during the dinner we made a new friend! His name is Jeon Hyung and he is residing at E's. Nice guy, really. A and I were amazed at his friendliness and the jokes he cracked. It was alot of fun (we camwhored),and he is so lucky to be staying at E's cos her family was nice enough to prepare a Korean feast for him! Ya but after that, my tummy...damn sick i tell u. I have to stuff my finger down my throat to make myself puke(not bulimic, i just need to clear the gas in my tummy). Im gonna show you guys the dinner photo another time alrt.

Oh this was on friday! during hydrotherapy. Found it to be really meaningful and its kinda fun as well. Firza, Grace and I were lucky enough to get nice boys as our "students", most of the time they are obidient. Oh they are verbally handicapped i think, but they are really nice kids=) But mine cried and held so tightly to me when he was suppose to sit on the wall , i presume he was really afraid and im amazed by how dependant on me he was on me at that point of time. My boy is called wei jie, he is firza's boy twin! hahaha !

Oh! Saturday was cheerleading btw. Learnt a few dance moves and help support flyers up. And i backed out from house comm btw, and its such a waste cos after cheerleading i realise dthat the hse comm nominess were really nice ppl, would really love to work w em. However, i know myself well enough that i would not be able to keep up with my studies and cca.

This photos were taken by Errfee while we were watching the match as usual. Great photog skills there=D I miss watching soccer in a complete grp (me mard A n firza), one of us is always having something on and so watching the match does not feel as good nmore=(

Btw, i srsly think i have to start living healthily. I mean i've been always telling myself to exercise and eat well and have sufficient rest but i've nv fulfilled it. Like on Sat i had KFC for lunch, then today Mac for lunch and the bbq for dinner. argh. Oh i kept on consuming sweet beverages. And i really have to slim down, i feel fat=( n i miss my long straight hair! ugh! i look fugly with my wavy hair...

And omg! i shld totally apologize about my excessive yaking abt my eyecandy. I think its irritating everybody but i really cnt help it.=(

RELEVANTMISFITS

2009-04-06T22:16:00.001+08:00

JUSTFORDEBI D, aren't you glad you're not alone?=)

i love you

IWANTTOSPENDTHERESTOFMYLIFEINYOURTIME

2009-04-05T19:02:00.000+08:00

YOU'RESODANGEROUSYETHARMLESSIDON'TKNOW

yay yay yay! When i 1st saw what Betty was wearing i was pratically squealing . I was telling my roomate how in love i was with that sweater.That was abt a month ago or so. Today i was just randomly walking in Topshop when i saw IT flashing at me shouting TAKE ME HOME. GRABBED it.OH THANK YOU TOPSHOP.

FABULOUSLYDELIRIOUS

2009-04-04T17:25:00.000+08:00

LET'STW!STAGA!N

i couldn't ask for anything better

CLOWNSSINGINCIRCUS

2009-03-29T20:11:00.000+08:00

THEYRANTOWARDSTHECAMERA!this was what i got from the shopping trip. The wasted youth top was from huimei tho! She got it while on a trip to NY a week back=D thanks baby!

met Imran eh! can u believe it? ahaha they couldnt really recognise him at 1st.

Mich:ei Imran whr u studying now ah?

Imran:MJ la

all: HUH!

Me: Same lit cls as me

.Stunned. hahaha!

I love them til bits a pieces.

YESTERDAY

2009-03-28T21:26:00.000+08:00

CHUNGCHENG=CONDUSIVEFORCAMWHORING

thanks joce and yt! for the pics.

UPSTANDING

2009-03-28T00:14:00.000+08:00

HOWCOMEALLTHISBLUESKYISAROUNDMEANDYOUFOUNDME my housemate's sweet16

my purchases today.

Went back to CCH to collect cert today, did something terrible, camwhored, caught up with some girls. Photos will be up when Jocelyn tag me on fb=D

p.s hate my face on yearbk. ugh.

2009-03-26T19:59:00.000+08:00

IMALWAYSGETTINGOVERYOU Pink makes me happy and therefore i camwhore. i have like candy coated dreams when i sleep with pink pjs and pink pooh blanket and pink bedsheet.oh not forgetting weiwei who refused to look into the camera.

"When my love swears that she is made of truth

I do believe her though i know she lies"

and this kinda lines make my day too!hahaha Mr. Wee showed us this beautiful sonnet by Shakespeare.I'll get hyper over this kinda pleasure and repeat it again and again.

NOWICANTSEEMTOMOVECOS

2009-03-24T18:07:00.000+08:00

ITFELLHARDUNTOME

school started. I havent been revising much, so now i have so much to catch up=( I'm so so tired everyday, but luckily i can now come back to a comfortable room. Yeap, my new room's view is really nice, and i love sitting on the parapet by the window typing away or just daydreaming. I've got so much in my head right now, and I havent really got the right advice. I don't know what i did or what im gonna do next but definitely i hope im hurting no one.

ITFELTSOGOODTOBEALIVE

2009-03-18T22:10:00.000+08:00

THELINESDIVIDINGSTRANGERSANDYOUFRIENDS

Just came back from a party, another routine when i'm back in Indo.

And another round of frustations as usual cos mommy is in control of everything. What i wear, how i wear my hair, how i put my make up, how i smell, which accesories to wear on which finger.

Then when i get there, i have to smile to well everyone and start a conversation with people i hardly meet just because its the only approriate thing to do.Listen to old chinese songs blasting right beside my ear.And sometimes there'll be an awkward silence. Gahhh hate parties like that, no homies just oldies.The only good thing is the food, which is not entirely fantastic because it leaves you with a guilty feeling after that. Did i mention it was a baby's 1 month party? well... without the baby's presence. It was just to show friends that they(the host) are now grandparents. hah!

That's my naggy masseuse! she is so talkative, she gossips the whole 2 hour while massaging me. And then she would start complaining about how dark i am now, and she'll scrub harder and her energy is like whoa =( haix, there's a price to pay for beauty.

TORRESGERRARDAURELIODOSSENA!

2009-03-14T23:02:00.000+08:00

ILOVELIVERPOOLLIKEFUCK

haha i noe i've put that in my msn pm and my fb n i'm still putting it here! I can't help it,i'm like overwhelmed with happiness because van der sar was so stunned and hopeless., and ronaldo n the entire united team was so damn desperate that we won them. I'm damn happy cos liverpool scored 4 goals and 2 came from Nat's n my personal favourite. Damn elated cos gerrard kissed me(ko albert rewound the thing to let me press my cheek against the screen). And and the highly-doubted-by-Nat Dossena scored! and Aurelio's goal was so brilliant and Torres look so damn extremely super cute(i've been telling that to my guardian's husband throughout the whole match)=D and most of all WE TRASHED MAN U 2x this season! ahhhhh!

i will be able to sleep damn well tonight.

p.s i'll be flying off tmr morning, cya'll!

2009-03-13T17:50:00.000+08:00

YOUHAVEMYATTENTIONSINCETHEDAYYOUMADEMYHEARTSMILED

This is where im gonna reside in starting from next wk. Its smaller than my current hse but the facilities it offers are way better. The photos were all taken from the clubhouse rooftop garden=) I was so bored so i walked arnd the estate myself, was peering in to lvl1 houses and saw some neat stuffs. Met the nosy neighbours.Unpacked half of my stuffs, alot more to go=( Worse thing is my whole body is aching, so it hurts so damn badly when i have to bend down to get my things from the boxes.Btw, see the grass patch above=P it's really small but can kick some balls there! hehehe.School bombarded us with lotsa assignments btw, argh! I havent got enough sleep this few days, and i don't even think i can recuperate during the break. And i need a mani/pedi and a facial urgently. Im so distracted by my ugly nails evryday, and yilu said i look like i got beaten up. I feel like a walking zombie most of the time.p.s i really wna get rid of stupid chinese story books, let me know if any of you want it(i doubt so) ,cos its so damn new it breaks my heart to throw them away. ahhh stupid chungcheng use to force us buy chinese story books that i can't even read/understand.

2009-03-12T21:42:00.000+08:00

YOU'LLNEVERWALKALONE

These girls are the best soccer mates anyone can find in the whole wide world. I look forward to every training because i just love practising with them while gossiping and looking at eyecandies=) i love them! And the one above she was taking this photo for us , but i happened to have a solo 1 of her! hahaha, i hope we can be like this forever=) p.s they are as bimbotic as a bimbo can be. Never will it cross ur mind that we are soccer girls=D

2009-03-10T20:49:00.000+08:00

teruntukmu hatiku

inginku bersuara

merangkai semua tanya

imaji yang terlintas

berjalan pada satu

tanya slalu menggangguku

seseorang itukah dirimu kasih

kepada yang tercinta

inginnya ku mengeluh

semua resah di diri

mencari jawab pasti

akankah seseorang

yang kuimpikan kan hadir

raut halus menyelimuti jantung

kucinta hanyalah cinta

hidup dan mati untukmu

mungkinkah semua tanya

kau yang jawab

dan tentang seseorang

itu pula dirimu

ku bersumpah akan mencinta

was like doing my lit and listening to this song then realise how poetic it is.

2009-03-08T19:26:00.000+08:00

THOSEDAYSYOUFELTALIVE

packing and playing with the com and camwhoring

We are so damn messy i know. And both me and my roomate are suppose to be Virgo. What's with virgo being organised? hahaha! excited about moving to a bttr place=D

2009-03-07T23:29:00.000+08:00

THATSUMMERHOLDSTHESWEETESTMEMORIES

example of a perpetual friendship

MOVINGOUT

2009-03-07T22:54:00.000+08:00

MOVING OUT

arghh packing is sooo tiring=(

its like putting your whole life into boxes, making sure u wont lose em

threw things that reminds me of certain people.

Reread pri sch diaries with childish entries. Found pri sch letters which is so damn comical ahaha! Im so gonna show Jughead the 1 he wrote in p6 when i c him in sch on monday.

I found out i wrote about hw much 'I' likes 'K' and how i tease em evryday. About hw i hate S. I found this notebook simin use to write in quotes for me.

ahhhhhh=) i miss my pri sch life.

2009-03-01T20:22:00.000+08:00

SAVEYOURSELF

TODAY i wna tell story ok. It's not gonna make your day cos its nth fancy or pleasurable but i just have to blog about it because it r-i-d-i-c-u-l-o-u-s. Let's call him X. X has been living in my hostel for the past 1 year i think. He is weird( and it's just not me who think so but the rest too) , abit over-friendly that people dread socialising with him. ARGH, ok i really don't like X. So he have this teeny weeny little crush on me but too bad he is not my cup of tea, even if he is i'd rather seriously have coffee. Its to that extreme ok. And so he thinks i hate him( i am but i dun show it but he somehow knew), maybe i always show him my dao face, but i cnt help it right? You don't see disgusting people and smile.

Ok, moving on. He accused the poor maid of stealing his facial cleanser , can u believe it? I mean want to steal also steal mine right, his face v smooth meh? And then! I don't know what's his prob. He took photo of the maid sleeping and wanted to show it to my guardian, implying that she was slacking. He thought that washing his clothes and socks and cooking for him wasn't a chore?Think 2x. I'd rather sleep all day long than have to see his face.WTH right? He probably thought she was superwoman or smth. Come on las be a man. So of course i didn't want to be so bo liao and blog about him , I'd rather blog about cooler topics or smth but until half an hour ago my roomate told me wat he did b4 he moved out 2 days ago. He! 1. cut the curtains 2. make holes on the tables. SHEESH, i know. Thank God he is not living near me anymore.Freaky.

2009-02-28T15:05:00.000+08:00

ITTAKESNOTIMETOFALLINLOVE 25th

well he can't see he's making me crazy now

i don't believe he knows he's amazing how

he has me holding my breathe

so i'd never guess that i'm a none such unsuitable, suitable for him

2009-02-27T21:16:00.000+08:00

YOUMAKEITREALFORME

. we were so desperate that we took photos in parkway this time round. I mean pp use to be too mild a place to hang out for us, but look at us!.

Caught he is just not that into you today with S and becca. It definitely confused me further about guys, like actually they are as complicated as we girls are.

Btw, I signed up for this REACH programme in school cos it sounds really appealing, it involves swimming! We are gonna teach disabled kids how to swim, doesn't that sound too good=D im looking forward! and i'm really desperate to go back to Indo for the March hols, i miss home badly=( I wna talk to my mom and tell her how's school been so far, i can't talk to my mom everyday like how most of you can.Btw, remember my grandma? yeap she is recuperating from her radiotherapy, she is still in pain but now she is much more positive because the session is over and she is finally back in Indo. All's well cos she is fine! Thanks for the prayers and encouraging words my friends!

i wna tell the whole world that im madly deeply in love with him but i don't want them to judge me. I wonder how stupid i can get because i always fall in love with someone i don't know. And this time round i don't even know the name ,yet instead i know very well the way he looks when he smile.I want to write songs about him ,wonder if there's something else behind his facade.Pathetic Cla, pathetic.

2009-02-26T20:44:00.000+08:00

THESUNWOULDALWAYSCHASETHEDAY

.overdued vday polaroids.

2009-02-22T23:55:00.000+08:00

you'vegotasmilethatcouldlightupthiswholetown

And.. I could tell you his favorite color's green.

He likes to argue, born on the seventeenth.

His girlfriend's beautiful, he has his father’s eyes.

And if you ask me if I love him,I’d lie.

2009-02-21T23:30:00.000+08:00

REALLYNOBODY'SWATCHIN

.pics of Olympica Parada 2009.

2009-02-21T12:51:00.000+08:00

IMISSSCREAMINGANDSHOUTINGANDKISSINGINTHERAIN

A beautiful ending to an atrocious day. Thanks A for trying your hardest to listen to my woes and be there when i really need someone to hug and cry on.I promise i'll be strong and get on with life. Thank God a thousand times we're in the same sch or else i really don't know who i could turn to. Im so glad that i met TFF ytd=D i love you all i miss having you girls in my class and i miss us singing to random songs in stupid tunes also knowing that we won't ever be alone.Joy! we had fun! jealous not?

2009-02-17T22:23:00.000+08:00

I'monlymewhenimwithyou Hehe! that was from my angel! After several days of ranting because apparently I thought i was the only 1 in class who have got a not-so-nice angel. But, however , surprisingly i received mine today and felt guilty right away because i was comparing what i received to what i gave. And although mine came so late , it came with a note saying alot of im sorry im sorry and so my angel is sooooooooo forgiven. Btw, i really really want to post pictures of vday but i'm so lazy to scan em now, will do it soon and show it off to you all ok!wakakaka. Btw judging from how C types on my tagboard i have a feeling C is debi cos C said LETS ELOPE. sounds like D huh.=P BUT if he is a guy, then im sorry to say LOW CHAYNCE.